HoneySuckle Love Page 9

  “No need to M. Tell your folks my dad will fix this okay? Call me when you’re ready.”

  With a bit of reluctance, I left the car and watched him drive away. The front door of my home opened up and my mother came outside looking at me. Her eyes were bloodshot, her face looked a bit swollen. I knew she probably had been crying just as much as I had been.

  “Hey Mom.”

  “Hi honey, are you okay?”

  “I don’t know if I will ever be okay again, but yeah I am fine.”

  “Come on in, I am sure you want a shower, and a hot meal. I’ve had some chicken noodle soup waiting on you.”

  “Homemade?” I asked.

  “Of course, do I make it any other way?”

  That made me laugh and smile, walking up the concrete sidewalk and into her embrace was the happiest part of my day. There was absolutely nothing that felt better than feeling your mother’s arms wrapping around you in a time of need.

  “Mom I’m sorry.”

  “Stop it you did nothing wrong I will not have you apologize again do you understand me young lady.”

  I nodded and cried into her shoulder. I couldn’t help it. I felt like I was an emotional rollercoaster. One minute I am smiling, the next I am balling my eyes out with tears. “Okay,” I said softly, as she continued to stroke my back and sooth me. Just like she did to me when I was a child and needed my mother.

  “Merewyn is that you?” My dad’s voice traveled through the house and I could hear him even though we were standing outside of the front door.

  “Yes Dad, I’m here with Mom.”

  He came rushing through the hallway and joined my mother and I in an embrace. “Oh baby girl I am so glad you are home safe.”

  “It was horrible Daddy, I hated it.”

  Great now I sounded like the age of a child that they were treating me. I really did need to move as soon as I was able too. I can’t keep clinging to them; I need to stand on my own two feet.

  “Come on go shower then we will eat.” Mom said.

  Dad nodded his head in agreement and said, “Yes yes go shower that will fix so much.”

  I pushed away from the two parents who couldn’t be more devoted or better than these two and wiped my fingers across my eyes and nodded once, “Okay, yeah, I’ll be back shortly.”

  My feet lead me across the tile hallway and into the bathroom that was connected to my bedroom. I moved the shower curtain aside and turned on the water. I set it to the hottest setting that I could tolerate. When I turned around to look into the mirror the image that came back haunted me. I looked defeated, like I had given up already. That angered me. Albert wasn’t going to win and I was a fighter. I pulled my wallet out of my pocket and tossed it onto the counter. Then I kicked my shoes off and stepped out of my pants and underwear. I wanted to burn them after where they had been with me. I tossed my shirt into the pile then my bra. When I stepped into the shower the scalding hot water burned my skin for about thirty seconds before my body adjusted to the temperature.

  As I stood under the spray of water I felt the grime and dirt traveling down my skin and eventually off of me. It felt marvelous with the water and soap on my body. While I was stressed to the max a shower always calmed my nerves and gave me clarity while in search for a solution. I wasn’t sure how much time had passed but I knew that my parents were waiting on me. I reached down and turned the water off and let the steam around me disappear. Mom always bought the best towels. The one I was using this week was a light pink colored one that felt as soft as velvet. It was so large that it wrapped around me one and a half times.

  The motion of drying off rhythmically calmed to my mind and brought it some somber peace. It was during this that the solution to the problem of the ring hit me. Jessie did some Googling, I can Google too. Just because he found that the proper etiquette was to give the ring back, I am sure that somewhere out there in the world is a judge who stood behind a woman who was cheated on and let her keep the damn ring. The ring that was supposed to be a symbol of love and affection, most importantly devotion to the relationship.

  I was going to find my precedent. Judges love when someone else has already set the stage. This would be my cure all and then I would be able to move out and start my new life. One that was fresh and free of the Albert stress. I walked into my bedroom and pulled on a light green pair of sweatpants and my sports bra and matching workout top. I combed out my hair and pulled it up into a pony tail. After reviewing how I looked in the mirror I felt much more like myself and I was ready to go face the world.

  The smell of the homemade chicken noodle soup permeated my senses when I opened the door to my room and walked into the hallway.

  “Mom it smells like you outdid yourself again. Wow.”

  “Thanks baby, come on and sit down by your dad I will start pouring the soup into the bowls. Then we can all decide on a game plan together.”

  “If it’s all the same to you mom I would like to just enjoy the rest of the night and not talk about it okay?”

  “Sure thing Merewyn. No problem.”

  I walked into the dining room where I saw dad on his cell phone. “What ya doing Dad?”

  “Just texting your friend Jessie.”

  “Why are you texting him?” What was the deal with my parents and their love for him? I do not remember them being this enamored by his charm when we were dating back in school.

  “Nothing I just like keeping him up to date. I saw that you were upset when he left you at the door so I wanted to tell him that we were taking care of you and that it was okay now.”

  “Dad please just let me deal with Jessie on my own terms. I don’t need you and Mom playing match maker.”

  “I’m not playing matchmaker I am just being courteous.”

  “Tomato tomatoh, either way please Dad stay out of Jessie and my friendship.”

  “Okay sweetie I will.” Dad put his cell phone in his pocket and smiled at me. “Sit down Merewyn and tell me, how is work is going.”

  That’s exactly what I needed, to talk about work. Something innocent and free of drama. Leave it to Dad to help me the most.

  “It’s going great, I really love working with the small businesses and times are picking up too. I think our little city is on the brink of a boom.”

  “Oh that’s good to hear,” Mom said as she came in the room with a tray full of food. “Now enough shop talk, let’s eat.”

  Chapter 10

  “Your uncle just called me.” Jessie’s dad said in a tone he hadn’t heard since he was fourteen and took his dad’s car out for a spin.

  “Hello to you too Dad, no hello before you jump right down my throat?” The knowledge that now he was going to get a lecture on top of dealing with all of the emotion that was going on in his head wasn’t great.

  “Not when I get a call from John saying that he bumped into Kevin last night after work. Who told him about his nephew getting in a fender bender with a pregnant woman.”

  “Literally Dad it was no big deal.”

  “It wasn’t? Jessie, I heard you were texting and driving.”

  “Are you asking as my father or as my lawyer huh?” Jessie’s patience was gone; he didn’t have the energy or the desire to handle this. He wanted a beer and a pizza and to just watch television.

  “Both.”

  His stern voice was crawling up Jessie’s spine; he wasn’t that fourteen year old anymore and felt like he didn’t need to answer to his dad as such. “Dad I was hanging up a call and slammed on my breaks and barely tapped the guy. Kevin gave me a ticket but that was it. Now I have had a crappy day and I just want a drink, can we argue some more tomorrow, or better yet not at all?”

  “Okay son, you win. But just remember I am doing you a favor where Merewyn is concerned so you could show some respect.”

  “I respect you a lot dad that’s why I called you. Look, sorry I just really can’t do this okay?” Jessie walked across his apartment towards the kitchen where he opened the f
ridge and got out two beers. “Will you join me in a drink?”

  His dad stood up from the chair and shook his head, “No I am going to head home. Got to prepare for your girlfriends case.”

  “She isn’t my girlfriend.”

  “I know son, but she will be. I love you Jessie, get some rest. You look like hell.”

  “Love you too Dad, goodnight.”

  Once his dad left, and he was able to settle in, he found an old black and white movie on TCM and relaxed into the nothingness of entertainment. His worries fell to the wayside and he started to enjoy his evening. He was starting to doze off when his cell phone began ringing.

  “Hello?” He didn’t even look at the caller ID he just answered out of habit.

  “Hi there.”

  The voice on the other end made him wake up instantly, and his back went ridged. “Hey, are you okay?”

  “I am thanks. I really owe you an apology Jessie.”

  “Merewyn, no, you don’t. It’s been hell for you and I know that. Don’t even bother yourself with anything you understand?”

  “I can’t help it Jessie I was so rude and crazy and just so many things that you don’t deserve. I know that you have feelings for me, hell I have feelings for you. But, I just don’t know what to do with them right now. You’re so great and I am such a mess and Jessie, I just don’t know what to do.”

  He started shaking his head while she was talking and he stopped listening. He just cut in while she was talking mid-sentence, “Merewyn just stop okay. Look the truth is I am still half in love with you and I will be probably for my whole life. You were the only girl that really made me feel anything. So if I can be there for you during this time then I will be. But you don’t need to even feel remotely obligated to say any of the things you were saying to me just now.” He could hear tears in her voice and he hated it. Hated that she was so sad.

  “Jessie thank you for everything.

  “Look if I tell you that you’re a big ole pain in my ass will you stop apologizing and just move on?”

  That got a laugh out of her and it sounded so good, “Yeah, that would actually help.”

  “Okay then, Merewyn you are the biggest pain in my ass. You come with a baggage full of drama and you are super high maintenance but I want to be your friend anyway. There how was that?”

  “Well,” she said with a bit of hesitation, “I don’t know if I should be flattered that you think so much of me or offended that you think so many bad things of me.”

  “Both, I only said the bad to get you to shut up and flattered because I do think about you, a lot.”

  “Here we go again walking on that slippery slope of dialog that I just don’t know what to do with.”

  “The beauty of this slope M is that you don’t have to know what to do with it. You just have to accept that for the moment it is a part of you.”

  “If you say so.”

  “I do say so.”

  “Then I have no choice right?”

  Jessie took this moment to laugh and he felt the biggest smile form on his face, “When this is all over I am going to date you like a normal man Merewyn you need to be ready for that.”

  “We’ll see about that Jessie James. Goodnight.”

  Jessie closed his eyes and smiled, he could picture the smile on her face that she got every time she called him Jessie James, “Goodnight M. Sleep well.”

  The two of them hung up and suddenly Jessie wasn’t tired anymore. He needed to get out and do something, or just stay up and be super productive. So he settled for productive. He went into his spare bedroom and started to unpack boxes. Boxes from his life before he moved home. Boxes that held the secrets he had been hiding from everyone, even his father.

  The secrets that he didn’t know what to do with anymore. When he pulled out a pocket knife from the drawer and opened the first box the flood of memories came back. This was the box that contained his office supplies and books from the last job. The last job he loved. It had started his career when no one would give him a chance. His mentor, Dr. Rosenberg, had taken him under his wing and helped him flourish.

  It had been the greatest opportunity that anyone right out of school could be given and he blew it. Not intentionally. But it still happened. Now he was back home with his tail between his legs looking to start over again. His dad knew that something happened to send him home. But Jessie wasn’t ready to discuss it. His best friend back in Lake Charles knew too. But since he was involved in it they had sworn themselves to secrecy to limit people’s involvement. He hated running from his past but he didn’t see any way around it.

  He pulled out his degree from Texas A & M, he had worked harder than anyone else in his inner circle of friends to graduate top in his class. A proud moment for him and his father. Jessie walking across the stage with the honor cords draped around his shoulders. His mother had just died the week prior but he knew she was looking down on him. The whole experience was hard because he couldn’t think about it without remembering the weeks leading up to his final test. How he spent those weekends in the Houston Medical Center with his mom and dad.

  She had died of a brain tumor. Something that still bothered him to this day. A few years had passed since he had to tell her goodbye for the last time but it still brought tears to his eyes. What would his mom say to him if she was here and watching him with Merewyn, or what happened with Dr. Rosenberg? Would she tell him to grow up and move on, or would she tell him to admit what happened and face the consequences?

  Randy, his best friend in Lake Charles, was a lawyer and swore that with what had happened Jessie was innocent but that didn’t bring him any comfort when he closed his eyes. He had the nightmare weekly, remembering each moment of what happened.

  Jessie knew one thing for sure; he would never go hunting again. What had started as a man’s getaway adventure turned into a man’s worst nightmare. He would never repeat that experience for anyone again.

  The second box was easier to clean out. It only contained his text books that he kept and his diploma. He had intended on hanging that up in his new office and bringing these books with him. Instead of adding them to the pile of items to sort in his spare room, he picked them up and walked into the kitchen area and placed him on his counter. He would bring them to work in the morning. This would start the healing process. Allowing him to begin to move on. It was a good sign he thought. While he didn’t have his psychology degree he did had a type of medical degree so he knew a thing or two of healthy steps. Or at least that’s what he told himself.

  Jessie needed a beer if he was going to continue this tonight. He walked into his kitchen and opened his refrigerator then pulled out a Guinness. He loved the dark beers. There was nothing better than a stack of chili cheese fries and a Guinness, in his mind. The two things his body loved more than anything. Which of course, he was now craving. He had a decision to make, finish the task at hand or leave it for another day. At this rate he realized he would never completely unpack, but he thought he was okay with that for now. Instead of opening the beer he just pulled out, he placed it back into the refrigerator and started walking towards his front door. He grabbed his wallet and keys off the side table and decided it was time to go to the pub.

  Somewhere between the walk to his car and driving to the bar his mood had brightened. Maybe it was the possibility of chili cheese fries, or maybe it was the fact that he was ignoring what was ailing him, but life felt better all the sudden. His spirits were lifted and when he walked into the pub he saw a barstool open, that gave him a smile. His own personal Cheers he thought, wouldn’t it be nice. He would make friends here and learn the town people. It would not just be good for business, but good for socializing too. Exactly what his mother would approve of. She was always for the most efficient and useful path and maybe he was doing some self-justification but that is what he was calling this midnight stroll in the bar.

  “Hey hun, what can I get you?” The bartender asked. She was a cute blonde wi
th long hair pulled back in a ponytail. His mind instantly thought about something else, he felt like he had gotten caught with his hand in the cookie jar.

  “Guinness please, and an order of chili fries.”

  “Ouch, someone is looking for some major heart burn in the morning.” She said to him.

  Jessie laughed and smiled, “Yeah but it is worth it, have you ever tried them together?”

  “Hun, I think that is one combo that not even a pregnant woman would consider touching. But your order will be right up. My name is Jean; let me know if you need anything else.”

  “Thanks Jean, I’m Jessie and I will.” He smiled at her and then turned around looking at the atmosphere. This was where he found Merewyn the other day, so he wondered how often she frequented this establishment. He hoped not too much because he would hate to run into her constantly if things didn’t work out. Because he was going to try and make it work that was certain.

  “Order up hun.”

  Jessie spun his head around and saw Jean placing his Guinness and chili cheese fries down in front of his spot. They looked perfect.

  “Thank you ma’am, that looks great.”

  “Your heart burn wishes, but yeah the fries look good.”

  “I promise, I will be okay.”

  “You better be. You know the TABC law, if something happens to you because of my service that comes back on me. I am sure that includes chili cheese fries, since they are in the same order as the beer.” She gave me a cute smirk of a smile, and if I wasn’t mistaken, I was pretty sure she was flirting with me.

  “Promise, I’ll be fine.” Jessie smiled back at her and took a drink of the beer. It went down smooth, wetting his pallet and settling in his stomach.

  The first bite on the chili cheese fries is always the best. It is that unexpected sensation of will it be spicy or not that got Jessie’s heart racing. The delight of something so simple was enough to take him away from his day of troubles and that was all he needed.

  Ten minutes passed and the fries were gone as was his beer. He felt better, more relaxed and refreshed. Somehow he knew things were going to work out, that gave him a sense of accomplishment.